Masturbation ...a handy subject with many advantages.

• you don't have to look your best
• you never have to say "I love you"...promise to mow the lawn... buy flowers/dinner...lie about the size of your hand's arse etc.
• if you use your other hand it feels like someone else
• you can use both hands and have and orgy
• you don't have to promise to call in the morning
• and as long as you're careful you'll never end up with the wet spot.
• you can make it last for hours, if you do it a certain way
• you can do it wherever there is a public toilet which has a private cubical (ie supermarket, shopping centre, railway station, on a train, etc, etc)
• you don't need to make an appointment in advance
• it doesn't really make you go blind, not unless your hand slides off the end and you poke yourself in the eye.