- when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up
- when people jog around her for exercise
- when she went to the movies and sat next to everyone
- when she was in the ocean and Spain claimed her for the new world
- when she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
- when she got to iron her pants on the driveway
- when she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller
- when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too
- when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!
- when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
- when she steps on a talking scale and it told her to get off!!!
- when she fell in love and broke it.
- when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.
- when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.
- when she's got her own area code!
- when she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!
- whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!
- when her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!
- when I had to take a train to get on her good side!
- when she wakes up in sections!
- when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!
- when she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!
- when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!
- when she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!
- when that her senior picture had to be aerial view!
- when every time she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
- when she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!
- when she got hit by a parked car!
- when they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!
- when she has to buy two airline tickets.
- when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up.
- when she influences the tides.
- when that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.
- when the animals at the zoo feed her.
- when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.
- when she stands in two time zones.
- when you have to grease the door frame and hold at winkie on the other side just to get her through.
- when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.
- when that she can't tie her own shoes.
- when she sets off car alarms when she runs.
- when she wears a Malcomn X T-shirt, helicopters try to land on her back!
- when the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures
- she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.
- when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....
- that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.
- when she was Miss Arizona -- class Battleship
- when to her, "light food" means under 4 tons
- when she went on a date with high heels on and came back with sandals!!!
- when she was zoned for commercial development
Thursday, December 16, 2010
YO MAMMA SO FAT
Labels:
yo mamma
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